U
/u/basedscroller
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I 17F have been with my boyfriend 18M for over a year. I love him dearly and canβt imagine being with anyone else, but I have a persistent problem. I canβt orgasm from penetration.
For some Background Info: * Iβve been on birth control since last October, when we started being sexually active. * From the start, I was honest about not being able to orgasm from penetration, and we tried taking things slow to see if that helped. * I felt very embarrassed that our sex was βpausedβ because of me, and eventually I just gave up trying to orgasm during sex. * Sometimes, after he finished and I hadnβt , he would try to focus on me, but I would feel too shy and embarrassed, so I would give up. * Over time, Iβve become more comfortable being vulnerable with him, but the topic of my orgasm remains sensitive. * I used to lie about having orgasmed when he asked, out of embarrassment, which led to some frustration because I still felt horny afterward but he was spent (heβs been struggling with mono symptoms for almost a year so he gets exhausted quickly).
Recently: * I accidentally brought my vibrator to his place when packing for our sleepover (it was mistaken for my bonnet and eye mask since theyβre black silk and I keep my vibrator in a silk bag. they all stay in my nightstand), and I mentioned it casually when I realized, but he brushed it off lightly. * Iβve hinted about wanting to try using my vibrator during sex, but I think I havenβt been clear enough. I tend to have to be very direct with him, or he doesnβt understand what I mean. * I have a high sex drive, enjoy dirty talk, and love doing things for him, but my inability to orgasm from penetration makes everything less satisfying. * On my own, I can orgasm fairly easily with my vibrator or fingers (never penetration), but during sex, I struggle to get there. I often have to relax and focus really hard, which leads to frustration and giving up.
Today: * I finally opened up and told him about all this. I admitted that I sometimes lie about orgasming because Iβm too shy or embarrassed. * He took it well and asked me not to lie anymore. I promised I wouldnβt, but I worry that next time weβre together, I might struggle again, and I donβt want him to feel bad or hurt his ego.
I love him so much, and I want to improve our sex life, but Iβm feeling lost about what to do next. Iβd really appreciate any advice on things to try, ways to communicate better, or suggestions for enhancing my pleasure. Thank you everyone in advance, if this does well I might even show him while talking about our next step!
(This got removed the first time by mods and iβm not sure why?? Iβm literally just looking for help because I feel guilty but also want to improve my enjoyment during sex? Iβm aware it looks like I may have used AI but my computer grammar checks everything I write and I accept the suggestions. Next time mods tell me what I did wrong when you take down my post because iβm looking for genuine help!)
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For some Background Info: * Iβve been on birth control since last October, when we started being sexually active. * From the start, I was honest about not being able to orgasm from penetration, and we tried taking things slow to see if that helped. * I felt very embarrassed that our sex was βpausedβ because of me, and eventually I just gave up trying to orgasm during sex. * Sometimes, after he finished and I hadnβt , he would try to focus on me, but I would feel too shy and embarrassed, so I would give up. * Over time, Iβve become more comfortable being vulnerable with him, but the topic of my orgasm remains sensitive. * I used to lie about having orgasmed when he asked, out of embarrassment, which led to some frustration because I still felt horny afterward but he was spent (heβs been struggling with mono symptoms for almost a year so he gets exhausted quickly).
Recently: * I accidentally brought my vibrator to his place when packing for our sleepover (it was mistaken for my bonnet and eye mask since theyβre black silk and I keep my vibrator in a silk bag. they all stay in my nightstand), and I mentioned it casually when I realized, but he brushed it off lightly. * Iβve hinted about wanting to try using my vibrator during sex, but I think I havenβt been clear enough. I tend to have to be very direct with him, or he doesnβt understand what I mean. * I have a high sex drive, enjoy dirty talk, and love doing things for him, but my inability to orgasm from penetration makes everything less satisfying. * On my own, I can orgasm fairly easily with my vibrator or fingers (never penetration), but during sex, I struggle to get there. I often have to relax and focus really hard, which leads to frustration and giving up.
Today: * I finally opened up and told him about all this. I admitted that I sometimes lie about orgasming because Iβm too shy or embarrassed. * He took it well and asked me not to lie anymore. I promised I wouldnβt, but I worry that next time weβre together, I might struggle again, and I donβt want him to feel bad or hurt his ego.
I love him so much, and I want to improve our sex life, but Iβm feeling lost about what to do next. Iβd really appreciate any advice on things to try, ways to communicate better, or suggestions for enhancing my pleasure. Thank you everyone in advance, if this does well I might even show him while talking about our next step!
(This got removed the first time by mods and iβm not sure why?? Iβm literally just looking for help because I feel guilty but also want to improve my enjoyment during sex? Iβm aware it looks like I may have used AI but my computer grammar checks everything I write and I accept the suggestions. Next time mods tell me what I did wrong when you take down my post because iβm looking for genuine help!)
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