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/u/fattycat9
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Trigger warning!! Un consensual sex acts talked about.
I was with my ex for 4 years, from 16. He was my first, so I guess I didnโt know much better, or have proof of it. My first time wasnโt nice, it hurt and I nearly cried, he covered my mouth. I donโt think he knew straight away I was in pain and was just trying to keep me quiet so no one else heard us. Throughout our relationship, there was a few times I cried during sex. One time I remember well he noticed, and kept going. I didnโt say anything however. He would always keep asking until I said yes, and got upset if I didnโt. I rarely enjoyed it, it was just easier to let him. It was also always only about him. As soon as he finished the act stopped. He would get annoyed if Iโd ask him to do more for me, and foreplay barely existed. The worst time was one morning when he inserted himself when I was half asleep. He stopped quickly when I reacted. Weโd been bickering before this about him waking me up on days I would get to sleep in because he wants sex, and when he tried that morning I just shrugged him off. I guess I didnโt technically say no. I know itโs wrong but thatโs what I told myself. The worst part is he put lube on beforehand. I knew none of this wasnโt right, but figured it wasnโt a big deal. Itโs only recently Iโve let myself accept what it is. Iโm writing this because I was listening to reddit stories, and one was about a girls bf doing something similar, and all involved in the story made it out as very bad, including the bf. Initially, I didnโt think it was a big deal. But it is, isnโt it? I guess Iโd just like to hear some other peopleโs thoughts.
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I was with my ex for 4 years, from 16. He was my first, so I guess I didnโt know much better, or have proof of it. My first time wasnโt nice, it hurt and I nearly cried, he covered my mouth. I donโt think he knew straight away I was in pain and was just trying to keep me quiet so no one else heard us. Throughout our relationship, there was a few times I cried during sex. One time I remember well he noticed, and kept going. I didnโt say anything however. He would always keep asking until I said yes, and got upset if I didnโt. I rarely enjoyed it, it was just easier to let him. It was also always only about him. As soon as he finished the act stopped. He would get annoyed if Iโd ask him to do more for me, and foreplay barely existed. The worst time was one morning when he inserted himself when I was half asleep. He stopped quickly when I reacted. Weโd been bickering before this about him waking me up on days I would get to sleep in because he wants sex, and when he tried that morning I just shrugged him off. I guess I didnโt technically say no. I know itโs wrong but thatโs what I told myself. The worst part is he put lube on beforehand. I knew none of this wasnโt right, but figured it wasnโt a big deal. Itโs only recently Iโve let myself accept what it is. Iโm writing this because I was listening to reddit stories, and one was about a girls bf doing something similar, and all involved in the story made it out as very bad, including the bf. Initially, I didnโt think it was a big deal. But it is, isnโt it? I guess Iโd just like to hear some other peopleโs thoughts.
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