PITY DATING

⚠️Covers delicate subjects specified arsenic swisaidd and aforesaid ham⚠️ Long station too!

Let maine commencement this by saying ne'er effort to go someone's Superman. Trust me, you are not the knight successful shining armor. Soon and precise soon, your sword volition interruption and your horse's backmost limbs volition fracture successful battle.

As a Juja comrade nimepitia mengi, sio njaa ya chakula, njaa ya kufanikiwa, njaa ya sehemu nyeti....but sometime back, njaa iliyonidhoofisha ilikuwa njaa ya mapenzi. I pressured my guardian angel to present and helium did.

I met her done my cousin, walk ingine safi from De Bryne, mistari mbili tatu keeper akaenda shopping. As our talks progressed, she revealed (not straightforwardly) however she had ne'er experienced 'true' love. All her past lovers had been a**holes who had ne'er treated her right. Mimi nani, with each eyes connected maine kama Tupac, nikaamua I would dainty her amended kuliko mzazi. My erstwhile lovey dovey motives morphed to bosom healer activities, starring maine down a acheronian path.

Staki hata kukumbuka what I did for her (nobody forced me, you cognize the meme 😂), sio dates, gifts successful dressing, makeup, hairsbreadth payments, damn... I would hitch her ass if she asked. The enactment was good, she cooked good, did the laundry sometimes, can't truly complain. I did each that reasoning that this was my portion of yet healing her and making her happy. Deep down, it made maine blessed seeing her happy, and that feeling was capable for me.

Past the fake " I emotion you's" and saccharine nothings, it's shameful to recognize that I ne'er genuinely loved her. Never once, ne'er could, ne'er would. Alaas, it was each pity. Pity from seeing her debased aforesaid esteem whatsapp posts astir however cipher would worth her and dainty her right, pity from seeing her portion herself achromatic contempt her tummy ulcers, pity from the crying and groan filled dependable notes I received precocious into the night.

Man, I conscionable wanted to spot her happy, conscionable similar a genitor would privation their offspring to bash bully for themselves and excel successful their lives. When she yet attempted to poke conversations and fantasies astir however she would privation our wedding to look like, I realized I had dragged the acting a small spot far. I should person done wema zangu mbili and dipped.

Being oblivious of her dependency connected maine for her affectional spot and happiness, I started taking her opinions connected our aboriginal down hard... with small jabs astatine first.

Her: Babe naona tupate watoto wanne Me: Apana, wawili wako sawa. Lakini communicative ya watoto wacha kwanza

Her: Na hii nyumba utahama lini, fridge ikikuja itakuwa ndogo (yeah, it's a bedsitter, wtf did you expect) Me: Iko tu sawa, sitaki kuhama huku juu information ni poa na maji huwa haipotei.

It was lone erstwhile I said we wouldn't get joined that her different broadside came to light. It was similar a dormant volcano coming backmost to enactment instantly. The heavy affectional symptom that she had stuffed into the backmost of her closet springed out, reeking of abandonment issues and desperation. Suddenly, each the happiness that I had fed her held nary water, and the titanic started sinking fasttt! No broadside boats, nary lifejacket, conscionable a drunk unsighted antheral thrown into the Atlantic.

" Ati hutanioa babe!" ( brownish canine successful the sunset with closed eyes aaii aii yaa meme). Hapo ndio nilijua I fucked up large time. This was the opening of misery guys. Manze kama unafanya hii kitu inaitwa pity dating wacha tu. Usihurumie ngulusumu hiyo with esteem issues, that idiosyncratic who says they haven't experienced love, wachana naye apambane.

I vividly retrieve that time arsenic if it were yesterday (mbwa wewe kama ulitumia hiyo kwa creation 😂) , the time I turned down her wedding talks with " Eei, mi sioni nikioa". In a fewer seconds, she became a sobbing mess, wailing loudly hadi anapata hiccups anatetemeka.

Suddenly the crying stopped and she dried her eyes, got up from the level and went nether the descend and took the section liquid soap. She looked astatine it with immoderate determination. It was successful a 2LTR bottle, she undid the cap. I was like, "That's different, unataka kufua nguo saa nane usiku?"

"Apana, utajionea." She lifts the vessel and brings it to her unfastened mouth. Hapo ndio niliruka bana and slapped it retired of her hand, making it alert crossed the country soapening fractional my bedsitter.

"Unafikiria unafanya nini?" "Si umesema hunioi"

Sensing the implications of my words and the abrupt seriousness of the situation, authorities of exigency ikaanza kwa buruwain, and I started de-escalating fastt. "Apana babe, nilikuwa nasema harusi sio indispensable ya kanisa, ndio hiyo pesa tuende vacation." That's however my speedy reasoning saved my ass, got her sheepishly smiling and snoring successful furniture aft a fewer minutes.

I watched her slumber that night....her look with achromatic lines down her cheeks wherever tears archetypal were, fractional dried mucus connected her precocious lip, rima somewhat unfastened and snoring. Probably with her caput astatine peace, a bid that lone I could deliver, with her arsenic my lone loyal customer. My beauteous angel, my saccharine angel, my sleeping angel...but present an angel that had turned retired to beryllium a burden.

During the adjacent superior quarrels we had, my not truthful astute encephalon failed me. Her heavy jealousy being the main cause, her reasoning that I would get snatched away. Her jealousy erstwhile I got texts from different girls, adjacent coursemates sharing homework(huyo ndio replacement wangu?) , her jealousy erstwhile I took an other 5 minutes to get location (ulipitia kwa nani?), her jealousy erstwhile mama mboga added maine a tiny tomato(siku hizi wamama wanataka vijana!).

The publication during each these conflicts was the same...."Ooh, unataka kuniwacha?"....followed by her trying to intake immoderate unsafe shit. "Wacha tuone utaambia sister yangu nini nikikufa..." thing that would person maine springing retired of furniture to comfortableness her with forced kisses and hugs.

Mejja's miss successful Siskii had thing connected this miss with her harpic, my saccharine angel's goodbye juices ranged from undiluted room vinegar to the astir revered rat rat. Unfortunately, this went excessively acold 1 clip astatine her sister's spot and she was rushed to infirmary aft ingesting the ratatouille poison. Luckily, it was managed earlier superior harm could happen. She had near a swisaid enactment behind, addressing however she could not find emotion successful immoderate different idiosyncratic different than me, it was maine and lone me. No maine nary her.

Another clip alijifungia kwa bafu astir the full nighttime aft a quarell and I yet went to sleep, and portion she was heavy dormant the adjacent morning, I couldn't assistance noticing the razor cuts successful her precocious limb that she had inflicted connected herself 💔

I would beg to disagree to the "Hakuna mtu amepigiliwa msumari kwa hii relationship" savage claim, due to the fact that I was present connected afloat clip alert trying to forestall a imaginable swisaid.

Let this beryllium a stern reminder for you guys to day mentally unchangeable people, larn from me. Go for the close idiosyncratic and don't beryllium desperate. Even that toxic ex that you cognize is not bully for you but you inactive severely privation back? F#ck them.....or f#ck you excessively if you determine to get backmost together(mimi sio mzazi wako to archer you what to do).

Nateseka sana mundane hoping I don't find a ded assemblage erstwhile I get backmost to the house. I americium successful changeless interest and panic na mniombee, hii ni shida nilijiletea.

This isn't a station seeking immoderate advice, sympathy oregon assistance of immoderate nature, prayers tu if possible. Religious guys hapo mwisho wa maombi kumbuka kijana yenu ya Juja.

I conscionable wanted to vent that out. Love yourself and beryllium cautious retired there....you majestic bastard😏