Relations between China and Australia have hit an all-time high after Anthony Albanese offered Xi Jinping a Chiko Roll for lunch, hailing it as “the spring roll of the South.”
Though hesitant at first to bite into anything that had been bought from the Coles microwave section, within the hour the Chinese President had finished four boxes.
“I used to think the only good thing about Australia was the Port of Darwin, but this has opened my eyes,” Xi Jinping commented.
Reflecting on what is essentially a deep-fried spring roll, Albanese mused: “This delicacy is a lot like Australia. It’s half dependent on what we get from China, yet it is also unrecognisably tainted by American influence.”
The Indo-Pacific region has since entered an era of utopia, and Australia’s GDP is booming thanks to billions of dollars worth of Chiko Rolls exports.
Reports say Albanese plans on introducing Xi to another cuisine from the heartland of Australia: Guzman y Gomez.
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Headline by Anthony Bell.
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